Adam King's blog : Craigslist Survey: Are Americans Happily Married?

Adam King's blog

What is your opinion of the state of married life in today’s world?  Dismal?  Bleak? Hopeful? You don’t want to think about it? 

Recent headlines would have us believe that the marriage of today is full of strife and adultery. The headlines are full of the famous folk, but what about the common man and woman?  Are their marriages faring any better?

According to a poll entitled The Truth About American Marriage sponsored by Craigslist, married life in America is not too bad.  

In fact, marriage seems to be working quite well for most of the people from Craigslist we surveyed: About 88% said they were happy or reasonably content in their marriages. Only 12% ranked their marriages at the bottom of the scale, in the range between “It’s miserable” and “I wish I could get out.”

Among people from Craigslist who stay married, 71% say they deeply love their partner and 73% are there for the companionship.  About half of the couples surveyed say they are happy, that their unions are “loving and joyful,” and a third say they are peaceful.  The unhappily marrieds are in the 7% slot. 

Men are most satisfied with married life, with only 30% saying they’ve considered leaving their wife.  Woman from Craigslist are not quite as happy - half of the wives have contemplated leaving. (I remember contemplating divorce the first week of my marriage).   

Married Americans fight about pretty much what you’d expect them to fight about - money (43%), who takes out the garbage (27%), and sex (22%). A full 56% say they communicate well and less than 1% say that fights “turn physical.” 

The best way to meet local people in your area looking for a relationship is to sign up for a Craigslist alike dating site. Loveawake dedicated to helping people find love online:

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Real Science - Are Women Better Wired To Avoid Infidelity?

Men and women react differently to temptation when involved in a romantic relationship.  As reported by the Los Angeles Times:

In an experiment published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in July, researchers at McGill University in Montreal asked 150 men and women to imagine chatting with an attractive member of the opposite sex. For comparison, another 150 imagined boring encounters with people of the same sex. After the visualizations, all participants played fill-in-the-blank word games designed to reveal subconscious thoughts.

Additionally, test subjects interacted with both male and female actors (participants were unaware they were actors) who were attractive and flirty or aloof, then were asked questions about how they would react to hypothetical situations with their partners.  The men appeared more critical of their partner’s bad behavior (for example, arriving late) after spending time with the attractive, flirty women.  Women were the opposite, they played it off, made excuses for their partner after hanging out with the “hot” guys.  In short, the men saw the attractive women as possibilities for romance, while the women saw the guys as a threat. 

According to this study, women are apparently better wired to avoid infidelity.  There is hope for the future of long term relationship, however.  Men can learn to train themselves to avoid that wandering eye. 

Studies have shown, for example, that New Year’s resolutions succeed more often when people first form a plan of behavior for specific situations. So the researchers had another group of men visualize a scenario involving a cute woman at the bar and a girlfriend gone for the weekend. Then they had the men complete the following sentence in detail: “When the girl approaches, I will [blank] to protect my relationship.”

When let loose in a virtual reality building, these trained men tended to avoid certain areas: the rooms with pictures on the wall of pretty women flickering imperceptibly, flashing for only a few thousands of a second — so fast that only their subconscious would notice. Untrained men, however, virtually flocked to the flashing-women rooms.

A reminder of their loved one helped the men to avoid encounters with attractive women. Interesting. For the complete article, check Love and infidelity: How our brains keep us from straying - Los Angeles Times.

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On: 2020-04-22 14:35:02.246